5 years after Jack Marshall's house burned down, killing both his parents and disfiguring Jack, he is chased into the woods by classmates bulling him, one of the bullies gets carried away, and kills Jack.
10 years later, the friends have a get together... And one by one they start disappearing.
How many (better) movies can one direct to disc film rip off? By my count at least 5.
- Jack is burned all over (Nightmare on Elm Street).
- The killer repeatedly phones the main female victim, sometimes from right outside her house (Scream).
- One of Jack's victims runs away from a creepy guy at a gas station... Who was trying to warn him about the killer in the back of his car (Urban Legends)
- After a bunch of kids are apparently responsible for a death, the ring leader makes them swear an oath of silence... Later their victim returns for revenge (I Know What You Did Last Summer)
- A disfigured School-Age boy drowns. Years later he returns as a killer with a sack over his head on, I shit you not, Friday the 13th (Friday the 13th part 2).
The movie's prologue has Jack (played by someone in what looks like a 2 dollar Freddy Kruger mask) being chased through the woods by a bunch of 30 year olds in school uniforms. Main bully goes full out psycho, and puts a bag over Jack's head, before drowning him in shallow water, pissing on his corps, and dumping him in the river. Despite the fact that the other four bullies all shouted at him to stop throughout the murder, he immediately turns to his friends and announces "we all killed him" before making them swear to silence.
You know how when kids "put on a play" and they have to dress-up, even if it isn't strictly necessary? Parts of this film are like that. In the prologue, main bully has a ridiculous wig, for reasons I can't fathom, and token-black bully wears those plastic bottle-bottom glasses from joke shops.
Later in the movie, main bully (now a cop) has a different stupid wig, and a moustache which looks like it was borrowed from the Beastie Boys.
10 years later, we see main girl (now with her hair brushed differently) fuck her boyfriend in a scene which I swear to god I though was about to turn porno, before promptly dumping him and flying home.
Once back in her home town, she's contacted by the other female from the gang, and invited to a horror-movie marathon the old gang are hosting in honour of it being Friday the 13th. Main girl refuses but is literally scared unconscious my her 'friends' before being kidnapped and taken to the movie marathon regardless.
At one point two of the gang (non-main girl and identity-free guy) excuse themselves from the gathering, quite openly so they can go have sex (remember these characters are in their 30s...)
Jack (now quite the sizeable dude) starts picking the characters off one by one, in no particular order (you'd expect main bully to be either his first or last victim... He's neither) untill the film finally ends.
Made with no clue how pacing, suspense, or basic story structure work, featuring actors who can't act, "Night time" shots which are clearly blue tinted day shots, bad wigs, fake moustaches, and faker tits; Bagman is appalling... But it just straddles that line where it's bad enough to be entertaining, for all the wrong reasons.
There's no trailer that I could find, but there follows a 7 min highlight (or lowlight) reel someone put together. CONTAINS SPOILERS.
Disclaimer:
If you look through the archives, you'll see that I've been using "Bought from Poundland" as a tag since at least 2011.
At the end of October 2013 I decided that all of my 2014 movies would be purchased from Poundland, and began buying up horror movies, to ensure I would have enough come October 2014.
In March 2014 I took a part time job at Poundland.
In accordance with the companies social media policy, in September 2014 I contacted Poundland's social media team to check that I would be okay to carry on with my plan to use the "bought from Poundland" tag.
I have been given the go-ahead on condition that I make the following clear:
All the reviews on this blog are entirely the opinion of Will Tingle, the reviews are not endorsed by Poundland in any way and (as should be obvious from some of the more scathing ones) are certainly not reviews I have been paid to write.
In short: The views expressed in this blog are mine alone, and do not necessarily reflect the views of Poundland or it's owners, shareholders, or management.
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